a variety of topicsApril 23, 2012
I am working on my book and digging through old Clark memories so much that it seems pointless and unhelpful to me to continue to write solely about him here. Though the book proposal process is moving way more slowly than I initially thought (maybe because it’s hard? who knew!), I’m chugging along. Before I write a new “part,” I have to go through the Google Calendar and my Gmail to create a sort of timeline of events, and creating that sequence of events drains me. But I am writing as fast as I can. The last part I wrote, in fact, was called “the best” so far by one Miss Jessica Guilfoyle.
I attempt to be amusing on my Tumblr, but that’s short form, people, and I have lots of things to say. So I am going to blog about lots of things here from now on, I have decided.
One last Clark(ish) bit, though: Did you read this weekend’s Times article on how psychedelic drugs can help the dying face death? Though Clark’s exhaustion after rounds of excruciating treatments helped him to accept his fate at the end, I think about the nightmares he had the week before he died, the pot smoke his lungs absorbed during the months he received treatment, and know this kind of thing would have eased his anxieties. Also, it probably would’ve given me a little comfort in the aftermath.
“I now have the distinct sense that there’s so much more,” said one patient, “so many different states of being. I have the sense that death is not the end but just part of a process, a way of moving into a different sphere, a different way of being.”
Uh, yeah, that would have definitely helped.