Archive for the ‘gays’ Category

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miss adams morgan, et al.

October 12, 2007

Last Saturday I went with Alyson and Dave and a few others to the Miss Adams Morgan pageant at the Washington Hilton. Kenny, love of my life, was featured in some of the performances, and his husband Scott, Miss Adams Morgan ‘99, looked divine. The theme was TV Land, so there were Lucys and Brady Bunch characters and Mary Tyler Moores and Morticia Adamses EVERYWHERE. I swooned over some of the best legs I’ve ever seen. I also got jealous. Here is some photo documentation:
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Someone asked me, “You’re a lady, right?” Yes, yes I am, sadly. Also, a gay wearing fake boobies let me and Al touch them and then proceeded to touch ours and spank us with a whip.
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Here are Alyson, Kenny and “Consuela.” Who is the hottest? Unsure.
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I am a few glasses of wine in at this point.
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Here we are giving people the right idea.
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Dave and I are obvs in love and getting married.
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Mmm. Yes please. Never been happier.

In other news, Statehood’s album is going to come out, er, drop, at the end of October and I am very, very excited. Please go to their MySpace page, friend them and listen to all of the songs, specifically “Every Single Question.” Here are some YouTube videos to whet your punk-poppy-rock-n-roll delicious appetite.

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current obsessions

August 14, 2007

1. Banksy. Chris turned me onto him with this photo:
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The elephant was then placed in a room where his painted skin matched the wallpaper. Then, while reading the Wikipedia entry, I discovered this nugget:
In August 2004, Banksy produced a quantity of spoof British £10 notes substituting Princess Diana’s head for the Queen’s and changing ‘Bank of England’ to ‘Banksy of England.’ Someone threw a large wad of these into a crowd at Notting Hill Carnival that year which some recipients then tried to spend in local shops. These notes were also given with invitations to a picturesonwalls.com Santas Ghetto exhibition. The individual notes have since been selling on eBay for about £200 each. A Limited run of 50 signed posters containing 10 uncut notes were also produced and sold by pictures on walls for £100 each to commemorate the passing of Princess Diana. One of these sold in May 2007 on eBay for $35,000.
I WAS AT THE NOTTING HILL CARNIVAL THAT YEAR. Only we were too busy drinking warm Heineken keg cans to notice any of these happenings.

2. Okkervil River. They have so many albums and are coming to the Rock & Roll Hotel in late September. And all of their songs are good. Especially “Kansas City,” in which they say the word combination “pretty baby” about a hundred times, and that really does it for me. Also Damien Jurado is opening for them, and we all know how I feel about him. He lost his luggage the day before he came to D.C. last time, and was stuck with the clothes on his back, which included … a BLACK FLAG T-SHIRT. I love it.

3. Getting out of this city for a long weekend. Since it’ll be spur of the moment and a quick vacation, my destination of choice will have to be in the U.S. I’m thinking of a fly into Seattle, drive down to Portland and end up in San Francisco before flying home. Ah, fall in the Pacific Northwest. It’s time for a pilgrimage. Hi, buddy!
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4. Obviously, winning the Rufus Wainwright competition and getting into Neko Case’s pants.
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work conversations.

July 25, 2007

Me: “Zack, do you want to see the cutest thing ever?”
Zack: *puts leg up on the arm of my chair so that my face is directly in his crotch*
Zack: “You know, we better stop this, or one of us is going to get fired for sexual harrassment.”
Me: “Yeah, we’re really straddling that line.”
Zack: “Actually, I’ll get fired for doing it and you’ll get fired for asking for it. LET THE RECORD SHOW THAT ON WEDNESDAY, JULY 25, REBECCA ARMENDARIZ WAS WEARING A VERY LOW-CUT TOP.”

Haven’t you heard? I love the gays.

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gay-tics

July 19, 2007

The gays discovered that my empty-desk-against-a-wall situation provides a good opportunity to stretch one’s lower back. Joey is gesturing, and Greg is feeling the ecstacy of it all. (I, for the record, did not stretch.)
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a blade introduction (or, i have nothing to do right now)

July 18, 2007

This is my desk. Notice the Rufus Wainwright poster (gay), the Cedars poster (sort of gay), the picture of me making out with Alyson (gay), the picture of me, Jessica and Nick at my mom’s wedding (to a man, so not gay), and my computer (adaptable to many situations).
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This is the corner of my office, where there is a shelf of crap and a bookshelf that I haven’t put things on yet. Notice the red, bordello-esque wall. My office also doubles as a sex den.
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This is gay porn. We have a shelf-full of it. These two are titled “Teacher’s Pet” and “Graffiti.” I have casually tossed them on my desk as decoration. I was feeling left out.
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the gayest music videos ever

July 17, 2007

These are the top candidates:

MIKA – ‘Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)


The white pants. Being the pied piper of a bunch of volumptuous women in the street. Getting on his knees. The pinnacle of fag-hagitude.

David Bowie and Mick Jagger – ‘Dancing in the Street’


I can’t take credit for finding this one, but I can take credit for finding gay man confirmation that this is INDEED one of the prime nominees for the title. Zack and I even watched it with the sound off to see if it was STILL that gay, and it is. Oh, it is.

Rufus Wainwright – ‘Rules and Regulations’


Rufus is wearing bulge-friendly long underwear old-style workout dudes pump various body parts around him. It’s amazing.

REM – ‘Shiny Happy People’


COME ON.

I am obviously looking for more suggestions.

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why did i not think of this sooner?

June 18, 2007

me: aw, lets just get married please
mrkyletaylor: um…
OK!
and we can both be allowed to sleep with other men
me: but we get to sleep in the same bed at night
mrkyletaylor: PERFECT

you’re damn right it’s perfect.

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suckin’ too hard on my Mika-pop

June 13, 2007

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Some gays may be mad at Mika for refusing to answer ever-looming questions about his sexuality. He’s “come out” only to say that he wants a gay following and that the hype should be based on his music and not which gender he’d prefer to go home with. His ‘Gay/Post-Gay/Not Gay?’ cover of Out Magazine left a lot of people with a lot of time on their hands disappointed — a top-billed feature in a gay mag should’ve given us some answers.

I saw Mika last night at the club. Maybe I want him to be gay so that my attraction to him can morph into mere admiration. Maybe I want him to be straight so that he defies stereotypes and, well, marries me. Because Mika’s show was possibly the gayest thing I’ve ever seen — besides Rufus Wainwright getting crucified as the gay messiah.

Before doors opened, two Dorothy-like girls in blonde wigs and poufy dresses distributed lollipops to the crowd. Mika wore light green pants, a white T-shirt and suspenders that hung around his waist. He hopped around, curls bobbing, and sang the pop-liscious hits everyone had come to hear. There was nothing sexual about his performance; in fact, it was juvenile and playful. The crowd — consisting mostly of young girls and older gay men — was there to have fun, dance hard, suck on their lollipops and sing along.

He began, silhouetted in smoke, with “Relax (Take it Easy).” A larger-framed black woman grinded with him during “Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)” and it was AMAZING and so sexy. He ended with “Lollipop,” and balloons and confetti showered the crowd. The audience consisted mostly of beautiful teenage girls, handsome gay men, and twentysomething fag hags. I was surrounded by my delicious girlfriends, Kenny and Scott (the best-looking couple in D.C.), and Dave, the love of my life.

So, I guess I don’t care about Mika’s orientation. His Jackson 5 and Eurythmics cover choices and the fact that he made me cry with his song “Happy Ending” help me lean in a certain direction, but it really doesn’t matter anymore. It should be all about his performance, and, after last night, it definitely is. Oh man, listen to “Happy Ending.” It’s just so. so good.

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no news ain’t good news

May 30, 2007

Because I have nothing to do at work!

I highlighted some of the poopy party emails I got in response to my Falwell posts, and now it’s time to showcase a delicious one:

I heard from Michael Petrelis, who I admire greatly and is the Andrew Sullivan of the left:
hey rebecca,
welcome to the blade blog. i’m enjoying your posts and even commented on one for my blog. keep up the prodding and questioning.
best,
michael

In his post on his personal blog, he wrote: “The Blade syndicate of gay rags has a new writer onboard, Rebecca Armendariz, and she’s quite busy posting up a storm of messages on the paper’s blog and I like her feistiness and rather demanding style.”
Verdict: LOVES IT.

Other than that, a few observations:
1. I hate pooping at work. At AOL, there were many stalls, and anonymity was key. The chance of my knowing the person also occupying a stall in the vast facilities was small. And if someone wouldn’t leave and I had to go, I just went to another bathroom. At the Blade, there are two stalls and I know everyone. Everyone also knows who I am because outfit inspection, and therefore shoes inspection, is one of the first things that happens in the mornings here. Becca wearing brown wedges = pooping = everyone knows about it.

2. I’m going to a Hillary fundraiser next week! There will be: hot dogs. Babyface. Katharine McPhee. Hillary. Maya Angelou. Billie Jean King. Pro-choice fever. Can you imagine anything greater?

3. I entertain myself daily by going to Slog, the Stranger’s blog, where Dan Savage is a contributor. Down the sidebar, though, are links — first to “Friends of Slog” and second to “Enemies of Slog.” Clicking on each of the “enemies” has left me in tears. Do it.

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hate mail!

May 22, 2007

In response to my first Blade Blog post, I received some hate mail! And it’s … drumroll … amazing!

Subject: Whenever you criticize the right, you’re just plain wrong!
Ann Coulter is right about everything. If you disagree with her, you’re probably misinterpreting something she said. You’re missing her point. And like most liberal DUHmocrats, most topics are beyond your comprehension to begin with. You should just be happy that the republicans around you are picking up the tab on nearly everything you enjoy in life! If you truly want to get a better understanding of the world around you, you ought to actually read Ann’s books cover-to-cover and look into the many subjects she covers. I didn’t say she’s right about everything without a full understanding of the subjects.

You took offense that she spent time on the teletubby “thing” – well, it was huge when it happened and liberals laughed, joked and mocked Falwell about it. Truth is, Falwell was right. And in spite of children not understanding what was going on, many adults didn’t either. It’s all a big joke and Ann understands it all. I don’t think you do though.

Subject: At least get your facts straight.
You hate Mr. Falwell, and are basking with glee of his death. Fair Enough.

However you are mistaken in your mocking of his statements in regard to Tinky Winky. As most are sadly.
Being that you are an editor, can you not at least check your facts before you print (type) them?

Jerry Falwell was only parroting what was already reported by CNN, The Village Voice and The Washington Post.

CNN reported over a year before Mr. Falwell said anything on the matter, “The Teletubbies also have a following among the gay community. Tinky Winky, who carts around a red handbag but speaks with a male voice, has become something of a gay icon.”

And around the same time The Village Voice reported, “The Tinky Winky character was supposed to be Gay”; not to mention The Washington Post who described Tinky Winky as, “next year’s Ellen DeGeneres.”

Funny how these same outlets a year or so later mocked him(as you are now), and called him a fool for his statements.

Do you treat all your subject matter this way, or did you just hate the man’s politics so much, that facts are inconvenient?

Sure, other people said that Tinky Winky was gay. Those people weren’t homophobes! When they said that, it wasn’t real, it was humourous, it was for fun. When Jerry Falwell points to the specifics of Tinky Winky’s outer appearance to chastise him as GAY, he’s serious. He thinks Tinky Winky has sex with men. Tinky Winky doesn’t even have genitalia, dude.

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