The Morning Benders and the Echo Chamber Orchestra – “Excuses” – I’ve watched this video so many times. I had a stressful night at work and just played it in the background, over and over, to calm myself.
My favorite track on Teen Dream keeps changing. This week it’s “Take Care”:
I mean, duh:
Also Jessica introduced me to what my life’s been missing:
Some memories are too painful or traumatizing to deal with, so we block them out as if they never happened. The other night during our conversation about Stealing Beauty, which is definitely one of the worst movies of all time, Jessica remembered that right after we’d watched it for the first time, she’d spoken to our friend Caitie about the movie, and Cait said, “Ugh, I love that movie. It’s just so beautiful,” and refused to believe that we had all thought it was terrible. Jessie was like, “AHHH. I had blocked that out until just now because it was so shocking! How could anybody like that movie?”
Liv Tyler’s character goes to Europe to lose her virginity and write poetry. Yeah. We, Clark included, had all watched it and couldn’t believe it was happening. One of her poems goes like this: “The die is cast / The dice are rolled / I feel like shit / You look like gold.” Clark wrote that on the wipe-off board on our fridge and we’d laugh at it every time we were in the kitchen together.
I have been trying to remember for the past few days how we got Clark home from his final hospital stay at Georgetown. Did we get him in the car? Did we take an ambulance? I have no recollection whatsoever. It’s totally gone.
The other day, though, I was listening to Roy Orbison, and I have one of the most vivid memories ever of my mom crying on the day he died. I was four! I love that I remember that. Also, the Traveling Wilburys were the most genius band ever.
It’s no secret that I loooove my friends in Poor But Sexy. When they first started recording, my favorite song was The Only Good Thing (About Saying Goodbye). Now, it is Big Chief. There’s also this amazing live video! You can see them at DC9 next Saturday, March 13. Best band in DC, you heard it here.
This.
Cella: “These are tears of joy and pain.”
You guys, I’m real excited about this Editors show on Sunday. I was talking about them with Lauren last night, and couldn’t figure out if the music is actually good or if I’m so blinded by my undying love for Tom Smith that it skews my ability to think critically.
With the opening notes of this cover of the Talking Heads’ “Road to Nowhere,” I get tears in my eyes (thank you, Instaboner!). And then there are photos like this one (obvs we are looking at the third one from the left here):
I was at an Editors show the night I first drunk-dialed Clark (which led to a week-long lapse in communication). And I took Clark to an Editors show a few months into our relationship, which was kind of hard for him because I was swooning over this dreamy English frontman and paying zero attention to him. But he was a total trooper about it! And now, Tom Smith, we meet again. I know it’s ridiculous, but there are lyrics like, “In the end, all you can hope for / Is the love you’ve felt to equal the pain you’ve gone through,” and “You burn like a bouncing cigarette,” that I have somehow convinced myself are the epitome of poetic. Because they are coming out of that mouth up there.
JUST LOOK AT HIM:
I think Jens Lekman – Pocketful of Money is one of the best songs ever. I’ve just returned to it, and I think I’ve listened to it at least 15 times today. I love when this happens.
Oh, NPR had a tidbit on BIG STAR the other day. I’ve owned a bunch of albums since college, but I hadn’t really gotten into it to this extent until now. And I think that’s because I associate it with nothing besides the present. I can’t hear “Gimme Some Lovin” by the Spencer Davis Trio or a Superchunk or Coldplay or Archers of Loaf or Pinback song these days, and I send myself on a not-so-pleasant journey toward emotional breakdown every time I try to listen to Sunny Day Real Estate’s “The Ocean,” but Big Star? Brings up zero memories. “Back of a Car” came on the jukebox the other day when I was at the Tune Inn and I almost pooped my pants.
I’ve worked at the 9:30 Club for over four years now, five if you count the time I was an INTERN. When Clark and I first started dating, he’d drive by on his way home from work or if he was out running errands, and I’d pop out of my cave-like box office hole, grab a quick kiss and a hug and he’d be on his way. Later when he got a bicycle, he’d ride over just to see me for a minute, even though we just parted ways two hours before. My five-hour shifts were too long for us to be apart. “I miss you so much already,” he’d text. We’d acknowledge that this behavior was sort of insanely obsessive, but ran with it.
I love the people there. After Clark died, many came to the memorial service. They ordered food trays for me, got me a card, gave me hugs and dealt with (and continue to deal with) me having freak crying incidents while on the clock. Sometimes being in the little box office makes me claustophobic and weird, and I can’t help but start to breathe more heavily and feel anxious about the fact that I won’t ever see him ride up to the corner of 9th and V again. When I would go to work when Clark was really sick, just to fake some sense of normalcy, I’d spend the entire time worrying about him and what he was doing and how he was feeling and if he was able to get to the bathroom OK. I think going there and realizing, hey, I don’t have to push to get out of here 15 minutes early, and I can totally stay for my shift drink because no one is reliant upon me, is something I’m not used to yet. I’m still sort of agitated, tapping my foot real fast, but nothing is pressing.
I totally met Johnny Marr last week, though, and Editors are coming soon. Good things.
A gift! The most beautiful demo.
And another.The beginning is a big treat.
Stitches and Staples #1 fan Kyle has informed me that the S&S mp3s from an earlier entry no longer work!
Here they are again.
